Confession
I am in the middle of a dry spell.
I can not seem to create any illustrations that I love. I create, but nothing is a whizz-bang. Nothing is something that I wake up in the morning and look forward to working on. Nothing feels on or right and nothing is portfolio worthy. I have had these before, but this one seems particularly severe.
admittedly, it has been a rough year here at Pippin-Mathur household, with Saurabh's surgery, his recovery and infection, the conference and his grandmother passing away. But, I am yearning for that feeling. That feeling of giddiness when an idea pops in my head that makes me grin, makes me what to create a certain character or composition.
I think it could be because of the conference. Yes, I loved every minute of it, but man, the competition is enormous and I realized how specific my style seems to be. I feel lost and most days I feel as though I haven't a chance in this field. Maybe being too unusual is a bad thing.
It could also be because I'm trying not to draw grandmas. Oh, how I love the little old, feisty ladies, but I need to expand and for some reason this has stuck me in a muck so deep I can't seem to get out.
Any tips on breaking this spell?
I can not seem to create any illustrations that I love. I create, but nothing is a whizz-bang. Nothing is something that I wake up in the morning and look forward to working on. Nothing feels on or right and nothing is portfolio worthy. I have had these before, but this one seems particularly severe.
admittedly, it has been a rough year here at Pippin-Mathur household, with Saurabh's surgery, his recovery and infection, the conference and his grandmother passing away. But, I am yearning for that feeling. That feeling of giddiness when an idea pops in my head that makes me grin, makes me what to create a certain character or composition.
I think it could be because of the conference. Yes, I loved every minute of it, but man, the competition is enormous and I realized how specific my style seems to be. I feel lost and most days I feel as though I haven't a chance in this field. Maybe being too unusual is a bad thing.
It could also be because I'm trying not to draw grandmas. Oh, how I love the little old, feisty ladies, but I need to expand and for some reason this has stuck me in a muck so deep I can't seem to get out.
Any tips on breaking this spell?
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11 Comments:
I've heard that a lot of illustrators go through this after a conference. You'll be back to creating great pieces in no time!!
I don't know anything about the conference that you speak of; just wanted to say that when it gets like this for me I find it is best to step out of the medium I am getting stuck working with and go with something new and different; make a mess; or be literal with the image; or just apply color to whatever without an image in mind.
Get out and live for a while. Stop trying to create art, and work on creating your life. Go window shopping for things you could never afford to buy, get a sitter and go to a movie with the hubby, go have lunch with a friend, get a pedicure, scibble nonesene in a journal at a coffee shop...
Once you get a little of the zest for life back that has been sucked out by unfortunate circumstances, I think your creativity will flourish again.
hmmmm, i agree with the anonymous person! and i truly understand because i feel in the same boat... realistically, we have a family... a kid that requires alot of CREATIVITY... so most times you are using it but not in watercolor... alot of people i grad. with and have been working in the art world seem to be doing soooo well... and yet, i have to think: "they are NOT a mom... they DONT have a mortgage... they DONT have to mop or sweep or do tons of laundry or is married to a husband that is forever working and doesnt have time to illustrate himself" i can't say it makes me always feel good to know the reasoning behind the lag, nor should it be an excuse... but i do look at where alot of energy is spent and i can see why doing artwork can be a challenge... it wn nnf n fnn fnfnn n nfn(okay, that was diego writing to you!)... either way, having a family is full time being an artist is full time and keeping sanity is possible but trying! thank goodness for people who understand!!!! ;)
geez you are one of the illustration friday artists I've discovered that I bookmarked because I love your work so much. Your style is so unique and full of energy and it's clear you work hard at it.
I don't know anything about your life or financial situation, but if you don't make a penny from your work, you and your children and grandchidren will always have your incredible paintings to look at and be proud of you for.
Sorry for the rambling but I can relate to your dry spell angst. I gave up painting for 2 years and since I got back I often feel like my work is too similar.
I love your grannies!x
Well what a surprise to visit your blog and find all these posts! I have you on my bloglines and it hasn't been updating me lately when you post.
Hey.. you are so talented and UNIQUE. Unique is good but in a lot of ways harder to break in as you are experiencing. But hang in there because once you have broken in there will be no stopping you. Savor these nuggets you are getting from the agents and keep plodding along. And hey...if you're wanting to draw grandmas...draw grandmas! Follow your passion, Courtney.
Once you allow yourself to draw what's pressing in your mind, new ideas will follow.
Btw, very sorry to read about your hubbies grandmother passing.
Hi Courtney!
I totally understand dryspells and slumps, or, as I've referred to it: Artistic Constipation! ;c )
Sometimes it helps me to doodle in my "Junky Sketchbook". This is the sketchbook where nothing has to be good... it can be doodles or babbling rambling sentences or lettering. I can experiment and be loose and create BAD drawings and who cares?!!
Sometimes I try to draw differently, experiment with new styles. I test out different mediums... colored pencil, caran d'ache crayons, whatever. Try your current characters on different backgrounds, or play with thicker lines, or practice everyday objects rather than people.
Also, I enjoy getting a "hairdo" magazine (they are full of faces and crazy hairdos) and I create a whole page of thumbnail portraits. I've done this with my old school yearbooks too.
Be patient and it will pass. You DON'T have to create a masterpiece or portfolio worthy illo EVERY time, even though you want to!
It was your feisty old Ladies who made me pay attention to your blog, I simply adore them! I always thought as an Old Lady I would want to be totally free in everything I do. Wear what I want, say what I want, feel as much as a Queen as I want. Your "Oldsters" are such a picture for that wild life I intend to have, where I don´t need to listen to a certain "marketability" or, worse said, conformity. I remember something from the book "The Treehouse" by Naomi Wolf, where she describes how her father believed that every heart´s desire appears to you first as a symbol. Me liking your old Ladies indeed represents a heart´s desire... and the slow steps I am taking.
Ups, I guess I meant to say how much I appreciate your style and I am certain it will hook others on!
Im taking a community art course which are filled with funny old grannies and grampas. Their histerical. The grannies took over and told the grampas to use a tree. The bathroom was theirs.
Draw grampas
COurtney,
I know the feeling so well...maybe a granpa? also..I felt the same way after the conference..it takes time to regroup...appreciate the other talent...sulk if you need to or cry...and then...dig down deep and remember what YOU love...what makes YOu laugh..and forget about the rest... I'm sort of in the same place you are..but I'm also coming out of it...creating some things for myself.
I thought of you the other day when I was looking through the Food and Wine magazine...I seriously think you should sub some work there..it doesn't matter if it isn't for kids..they often have very quirky work there..and if you got in there..it would be a huge door that would allow you to easily get into kid's mags and books...seriously...sub some things there..
and remember..it's been a longish grey/cold winter..you've been through a lot...that explains much of what you're going through...soon you'll be popping up with new fun images and the joy that makes them that way..
hi courtney!
i am so late on this one, i might have missed the boat. But, what i wanted to say was that ... 10 years ago or so, I met with Charles Schulz who lived nearby and his office was nearly outside my bedroom window. I showed him my "doodlesoup" ... (in a little different manner, but very similiar), and he suggested I draw a completely different theme. But this theme didn't come from my heart and I didn't draw for a long time after that. I competed against my own self trying to create from his dream for me.
Please continue drawing "grandmas" because it's your place of creativity and inspiration. I don't know what they told you.. but it doesn't matter. It was their voice that came from their own experience. Your art is wonderful and whimsical and humorous and gut-wrenchingly sweet.
Please hold on to who you are. I love your grandmothers. Please never stop painting them.
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